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    My popularity in Ayawaso East stems from integrity, not inducement – Baba Jamal

    I never shared television at Ayawaso by-election – Baba Jamal

    My popularity in Ayawaso East stems from integrity, not inducement – Baba Jamal

    Baba Jamal appears before committee probing vote-buying claims in Ayawaso East

    NPP presidential election committee commends police for peaceful primary

    NPP presidential election committee commends police for peaceful primary

    Ghana and Qatar begin implementation of Labour Mobility Agreement

    We tricked NPP by urging them to vote Ken Agyapong as flagbearer – Kwakye-Ackah

    We’ve already handed the steer to you – Obuasi Chiefs hail Bawumia

    Bawumi’s election as 2028 flagbearer is ‘sweet victory for the NPP’ – Krobea Asante

    ‘Ghana is ripe for a coup’ – Asiedu Nketia warns

    NDC congratulates NPP on peaceful presidential primary

    Sammy Gyamfi to Dr. Bawumia – It is embarrassing to polled less than 62% votes

    Bawumia vows to leverage a united NPP for victory in 2028 elections

    Kennedy Agyapong doesn’t deserve to lead NPP let alone Ghana – Madhi Gibril

    Kennedy Agyapong doesn’t deserve to lead NPP let alone Ghana – Madhi Gibril

    Dr. Bawumia elected NPP presidential candidate

    Dr. Bawumia elected NPP presidential candidate

  • Politics
    NDC treated 24-hour economy more as a campaign slogan than a policy — Afenyo‑Markin

    NDC treated 24-hour economy more as a campaign slogan than a policy — Afenyo‑Markin

    Cocoa farmers want their money not jargons – Minority tells NDC gov’t

    Cocoa farmers want their money not jargons – Minority tells NDC gov’t

    Incompetent ‘Randy Abbey’ should be fired as COCOBOD CEO – Odike

    Cocoa crisis could be detrimental to NDC – Odike

    Ghana is bigger than any party; protect our democracy – Bawumia urges government

    Ghana is bigger than any party; protect our democracy – Bawumia urges government

    Court of Appeal upholds Kennedy Agyapong’s appeal against Kweku Baako

    NDC deceived cocoa farmers to earn their votes in 2024 elections – Aduse Poku

    Ofosu Nkansah dismisses claims over NIB exhibits, says documents were youth support requests

    Ofosu Nkansah dismisses claims over NIB exhibits, says documents were youth support requests

    NDC deceived cocoa farmers to earn their votes in 2024 elections – Aduse Poku

    NPP left COCOBOD in GH¢3.8billion debt before leaving office – Asunafo North MP alleges

    My popularity in Ayawaso East stems from integrity, not inducement – Baba Jamal

    I never shared television at Ayawaso by-election – Baba Jamal

    Mahama Ayaba commends president Mahama for bold stance against vote buying

  • News
    • Local News
  • Business

    COCOBOD management, staff should’ve taken 50% pay cut instead of the 20% – Ama Daaku

    CDAG demands revocation of licenses for OMCs selling diluted fuel

    CDAG demands revocation of licenses for OMCs selling diluted fuel

    Coldmart opens at Ofankor, Accra

    Coldmart opens at Ofankor, Accra

    Mahama’s Cabinet meeting over Cocoa sector crisis is bogus, useless

    Cocoa farmers want their money not jargons – Minority tells NDC gov’t

    Cocoa farmers want their money not jargons – Minority tells NDC gov’t

    Richard Nii Armah Quaye gifts loyal customer GH₵50,000 on valentine’s day

    Richard Nii Armah Quaye gifts loyal customer GH₵50,000 on valentine’s day

    Cocoa producer price reduced to GH¢41,392 per tonne and GH¢2,587 per bag

    Ghana to stop foreign financing for cocoa purchases – Prez Mahama

    Ghanaian tomato traders caught in Burkina Faso terror attack – Interior Ministry

    Ghanaian tomato traders caught in Burkina Faso terror attack – Interior Ministry

    GTA CEO urges students to protect the environment, support the local cocoa industry

    GTA CEO urges students to protect the environment, support the local cocoa industry

  • Education
    Use Artificial Intelligence responsibly – Sam George warns

    Use Artificial Intelligence responsibly – Sam George warns

    GTA CEO urges students to protect the environment, support the local cocoa industry

    GTA CEO urges students to protect the environment, support the local cocoa industry

    Agona East MP awards scholarships, laptops to 100 tertiary students

    Agona East MP awards scholarships, laptops to 100 tertiary students

    Adukrom: Truck transporting food supplies to SHSs in parts of Eastern Region involved in accident

    Adukrom: Truck transporting food supplies to SHSs in parts of Eastern Region involved in accident

    Haruna Iddrisu, accident victims all in stable condition – Education Ministry

    Haruna Iddrisu, accident victims all in stable condition – Education Ministry

    Education Minister Haruna Iddrisu, and Mohammed Adams involved in accident on Bolga-Tumu highway 

    Education Minister Haruna Iddrisu, and Mohammed Adams involved in accident on Bolga-Tumu highway 

    GES celebrates girls in STEM on int’l day for women and girls in science

    GES celebrates girls in STEM on int’l day for women and girls in science

    Madina MP Francis-Xavier Sosu receives PhD in Law, launches vision for Africa’s economic integration

    Madina MP Francis-Xavier Sosu receives PhD in Law, launches vision for Africa’s economic integration

    Francis-Xavier Sosu earns PhD in Law, unveils vision for Africa’s economic integration

    Francis-Xavier Sosu earns PhD in Law, unveils vision for Africa’s economic integration

  • Health
    FDA raises alarm over viral ‘cement beans’ Video

    FDA raises alarm over viral ‘cement beans’ Video

    Look for highly absorbent diapers for children’s safety – Korle Bu medical officer advises mothers

    Look for highly absorbent diapers for children’s safety – Korle Bu medical officer advises mothers

    Ghana joins global commemoration of the international day of zero tolerance for FGM

    Ghana joins global commemoration of the international day of zero tolerance for FGM

    Gov’t pays salaries of 6,000 newly recruited nurses

    President Mahama bemoans rising migration of health workers

    GHS, partners mark Cancer Day with renewed call to close care gap

    GHS, partners mark Cancer Day with renewed call to close care gap

    Help us save lives: GMTF boss appeals to corporate Ghana to rescue Ridge Hospital

    Help us save lives: GMTF boss appeals to corporate Ghana to rescue Ridge Hospital

    Ablekuma North MP urges Ghanaians to take cancer seriously as cases hit 24,000 annually

    Ablekuma North MP urges Ghanaians to take cancer seriously as cases hit 24,000 annually

    Health Minister launches audit of Oti Region facilities

    Health Minister launches audit of Oti Region facilities

    Health Minister vows to bridge infrastructure gap at Asesewa hospital

    Health Minister vows to bridge infrastructure gap at Asesewa hospital

    • Lifestyle
  • Entertainment
    Wendy Shay defends Ghanaian women amid viral video controversy

    Wendy Shay defends Ghanaian women amid viral video controversy

    Efya marries Nigerian singer, Tomi Thomas in private Valentine’s day ceremony

    Efya marries Nigerian singer, Tomi Thomas in private Valentine’s day ceremony

    It’s a bigger issue than blaming women — Efia Odo reacts to viral videos

    It’s a bigger issue than blaming women — Efia Odo reacts to viral videos

    Jamaican dancehall star visits Hamamat’s Shea Butter Village for massage

    Jamaican dancehall star visits Hamamat’s Shea Butter Village for massage

    And so what if Black Sherif’s album does better than mine, stop the “nonsense” – Shatta Wale

    ‘Gerrout’ with your hypocritical talks’; Ghanaian women aren’t cheap — Shatta Wale fires

    Pastor Elisha Osei Kofi reportedly dies

    Pastor Elisha Osei Kofi reportedly dies

    Ghanaian fashion influencer exposes shocking theft by former houseboy

    Ghanaian fashion influencer exposes shocking theft by former houseboy

    Global YouTube star iShowSpeed touches down in Ghana for cultural experience

    IShowSpeed reacts to Mahama’s remarks on his Ghana visit

    Esther Smith calls out churches over GH¢60,000 auditorium fee

    Esther Smith calls out churches over GH¢60,000 auditorium fee

  • Features
  • World
    Mahama reaffirms solidarity with Kenya at Jamhuri day celebration

    Mahama reaffirms solidarity with Kenya at Jamhuri day celebration

    Israeli troops kill municipal worker in south Lebanon raid

    Israeli troops kill municipal worker in south Lebanon raid

    Keeping the historical memory: Latin America’s participation in World War II

    Keeping the historical memory: Latin America’s participation in World War II

    Premature shut down of Washington embassy dents Ghana’s Foreign Service – Minority

    Israel-Iran Conflict: Safety of Ghanaians must be national priority – Minority to gov’t

    Cardinal Leo XIV elected as first American pope

    Cardinal Leo XIV elected as first American pope

    IMF warns that U.S. tariffs could destabilize global economy

    IMF warns that U.S. tariffs could destabilize global economy

    World Cup 2026: Argentina qualify ahead of Brazil showdown

    World Cup 2026: Argentina qualify ahead of Brazil showdown

    Heavyweight boxing legend George Foreman dies aged 76

    Heavyweight boxing legend George Foreman dies aged 76

    The truth behind presidential sunglasses: Why leaders like Mahama wear them

    The truth behind presidential sunglasses: Why leaders like Mahama wear them

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  • Home
  • Elections
    My popularity in Ayawaso East stems from integrity, not inducement – Baba Jamal

    I never shared television at Ayawaso by-election – Baba Jamal

    My popularity in Ayawaso East stems from integrity, not inducement – Baba Jamal

    Baba Jamal appears before committee probing vote-buying claims in Ayawaso East

    NPP presidential election committee commends police for peaceful primary

    NPP presidential election committee commends police for peaceful primary

    Ghana and Qatar begin implementation of Labour Mobility Agreement

    We tricked NPP by urging them to vote Ken Agyapong as flagbearer – Kwakye-Ackah

    We’ve already handed the steer to you – Obuasi Chiefs hail Bawumia

    Bawumi’s election as 2028 flagbearer is ‘sweet victory for the NPP’ – Krobea Asante

    ‘Ghana is ripe for a coup’ – Asiedu Nketia warns

    NDC congratulates NPP on peaceful presidential primary

    Sammy Gyamfi to Dr. Bawumia – It is embarrassing to polled less than 62% votes

    Bawumia vows to leverage a united NPP for victory in 2028 elections

    Kennedy Agyapong doesn’t deserve to lead NPP let alone Ghana – Madhi Gibril

    Kennedy Agyapong doesn’t deserve to lead NPP let alone Ghana – Madhi Gibril

    Dr. Bawumia elected NPP presidential candidate

    Dr. Bawumia elected NPP presidential candidate

  • Politics
    NDC treated 24-hour economy more as a campaign slogan than a policy — Afenyo‑Markin

    NDC treated 24-hour economy more as a campaign slogan than a policy — Afenyo‑Markin

    Cocoa farmers want their money not jargons – Minority tells NDC gov’t

    Cocoa farmers want their money not jargons – Minority tells NDC gov’t

    Incompetent ‘Randy Abbey’ should be fired as COCOBOD CEO – Odike

    Cocoa crisis could be detrimental to NDC – Odike

    Ghana is bigger than any party; protect our democracy – Bawumia urges government

    Ghana is bigger than any party; protect our democracy – Bawumia urges government

    Court of Appeal upholds Kennedy Agyapong’s appeal against Kweku Baako

    NDC deceived cocoa farmers to earn their votes in 2024 elections – Aduse Poku

    Ofosu Nkansah dismisses claims over NIB exhibits, says documents were youth support requests

    Ofosu Nkansah dismisses claims over NIB exhibits, says documents were youth support requests

    NDC deceived cocoa farmers to earn their votes in 2024 elections – Aduse Poku

    NPP left COCOBOD in GH¢3.8billion debt before leaving office – Asunafo North MP alleges

    My popularity in Ayawaso East stems from integrity, not inducement – Baba Jamal

    I never shared television at Ayawaso by-election – Baba Jamal

    Mahama Ayaba commends president Mahama for bold stance against vote buying

  • News
    • Local News
  • Business

    COCOBOD management, staff should’ve taken 50% pay cut instead of the 20% – Ama Daaku

    CDAG demands revocation of licenses for OMCs selling diluted fuel

    CDAG demands revocation of licenses for OMCs selling diluted fuel

    Coldmart opens at Ofankor, Accra

    Coldmart opens at Ofankor, Accra

    Mahama’s Cabinet meeting over Cocoa sector crisis is bogus, useless

    Cocoa farmers want their money not jargons – Minority tells NDC gov’t

    Cocoa farmers want their money not jargons – Minority tells NDC gov’t

    Richard Nii Armah Quaye gifts loyal customer GH₵50,000 on valentine’s day

    Richard Nii Armah Quaye gifts loyal customer GH₵50,000 on valentine’s day

    Cocoa producer price reduced to GH¢41,392 per tonne and GH¢2,587 per bag

    Ghana to stop foreign financing for cocoa purchases – Prez Mahama

    Ghanaian tomato traders caught in Burkina Faso terror attack – Interior Ministry

    Ghanaian tomato traders caught in Burkina Faso terror attack – Interior Ministry

    GTA CEO urges students to protect the environment, support the local cocoa industry

    GTA CEO urges students to protect the environment, support the local cocoa industry

  • Education
    Use Artificial Intelligence responsibly – Sam George warns

    Use Artificial Intelligence responsibly – Sam George warns

    GTA CEO urges students to protect the environment, support the local cocoa industry

    GTA CEO urges students to protect the environment, support the local cocoa industry

    Agona East MP awards scholarships, laptops to 100 tertiary students

    Agona East MP awards scholarships, laptops to 100 tertiary students

    Adukrom: Truck transporting food supplies to SHSs in parts of Eastern Region involved in accident

    Adukrom: Truck transporting food supplies to SHSs in parts of Eastern Region involved in accident

    Haruna Iddrisu, accident victims all in stable condition – Education Ministry

    Haruna Iddrisu, accident victims all in stable condition – Education Ministry

    Education Minister Haruna Iddrisu, and Mohammed Adams involved in accident on Bolga-Tumu highway 

    Education Minister Haruna Iddrisu, and Mohammed Adams involved in accident on Bolga-Tumu highway 

    GES celebrates girls in STEM on int’l day for women and girls in science

    GES celebrates girls in STEM on int’l day for women and girls in science

    Madina MP Francis-Xavier Sosu receives PhD in Law, launches vision for Africa’s economic integration

    Madina MP Francis-Xavier Sosu receives PhD in Law, launches vision for Africa’s economic integration

    Francis-Xavier Sosu earns PhD in Law, unveils vision for Africa’s economic integration

    Francis-Xavier Sosu earns PhD in Law, unveils vision for Africa’s economic integration

  • Health
    FDA raises alarm over viral ‘cement beans’ Video

    FDA raises alarm over viral ‘cement beans’ Video

    Look for highly absorbent diapers for children’s safety – Korle Bu medical officer advises mothers

    Look for highly absorbent diapers for children’s safety – Korle Bu medical officer advises mothers

    Ghana joins global commemoration of the international day of zero tolerance for FGM

    Ghana joins global commemoration of the international day of zero tolerance for FGM

    Gov’t pays salaries of 6,000 newly recruited nurses

    President Mahama bemoans rising migration of health workers

    GHS, partners mark Cancer Day with renewed call to close care gap

    GHS, partners mark Cancer Day with renewed call to close care gap

    Help us save lives: GMTF boss appeals to corporate Ghana to rescue Ridge Hospital

    Help us save lives: GMTF boss appeals to corporate Ghana to rescue Ridge Hospital

    Ablekuma North MP urges Ghanaians to take cancer seriously as cases hit 24,000 annually

    Ablekuma North MP urges Ghanaians to take cancer seriously as cases hit 24,000 annually

    Health Minister launches audit of Oti Region facilities

    Health Minister launches audit of Oti Region facilities

    Health Minister vows to bridge infrastructure gap at Asesewa hospital

    Health Minister vows to bridge infrastructure gap at Asesewa hospital

    • Lifestyle
  • Entertainment
    Wendy Shay defends Ghanaian women amid viral video controversy

    Wendy Shay defends Ghanaian women amid viral video controversy

    Efya marries Nigerian singer, Tomi Thomas in private Valentine’s day ceremony

    Efya marries Nigerian singer, Tomi Thomas in private Valentine’s day ceremony

    It’s a bigger issue than blaming women — Efia Odo reacts to viral videos

    It’s a bigger issue than blaming women — Efia Odo reacts to viral videos

    Jamaican dancehall star visits Hamamat’s Shea Butter Village for massage

    Jamaican dancehall star visits Hamamat’s Shea Butter Village for massage

    And so what if Black Sherif’s album does better than mine, stop the “nonsense” – Shatta Wale

    ‘Gerrout’ with your hypocritical talks’; Ghanaian women aren’t cheap — Shatta Wale fires

    Pastor Elisha Osei Kofi reportedly dies

    Pastor Elisha Osei Kofi reportedly dies

    Ghanaian fashion influencer exposes shocking theft by former houseboy

    Ghanaian fashion influencer exposes shocking theft by former houseboy

    Global YouTube star iShowSpeed touches down in Ghana for cultural experience

    IShowSpeed reacts to Mahama’s remarks on his Ghana visit

    Esther Smith calls out churches over GH¢60,000 auditorium fee

    Esther Smith calls out churches over GH¢60,000 auditorium fee

  • Features
  • World
    Mahama reaffirms solidarity with Kenya at Jamhuri day celebration

    Mahama reaffirms solidarity with Kenya at Jamhuri day celebration

    Israeli troops kill municipal worker in south Lebanon raid

    Israeli troops kill municipal worker in south Lebanon raid

    Keeping the historical memory: Latin America’s participation in World War II

    Keeping the historical memory: Latin America’s participation in World War II

    Premature shut down of Washington embassy dents Ghana’s Foreign Service – Minority

    Israel-Iran Conflict: Safety of Ghanaians must be national priority – Minority to gov’t

    Cardinal Leo XIV elected as first American pope

    Cardinal Leo XIV elected as first American pope

    IMF warns that U.S. tariffs could destabilize global economy

    IMF warns that U.S. tariffs could destabilize global economy

    World Cup 2026: Argentina qualify ahead of Brazil showdown

    World Cup 2026: Argentina qualify ahead of Brazil showdown

    Heavyweight boxing legend George Foreman dies aged 76

    Heavyweight boxing legend George Foreman dies aged 76

    The truth behind presidential sunglasses: Why leaders like Mahama wear them

    The truth behind presidential sunglasses: Why leaders like Mahama wear them

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Home Features

Mawuli Zogbenu: Transparent ‘Abɛ nkwan’

by Jerry Tsatro Mordy
February 28, 2021
in Features, Top Story
Reading Time: 4 mins read
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Mawuli Zogbenu

Mawuli Zogbenu

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The most confident man is the man who goes for a job interview and tells the panelists after he has been asked ‘can you take pressure?’ and he answers: ‘I owe my landlord rent for 2 and half years’.

They are some of the people who can take-over your property if you make them care-takers (hw3so mami) of your uncompleted buildings if you want to be the Mr. or Ms. Good Person’ o. I hope you remember ‘Akwetey Police’ who nearly succeeded in using the property I made him to be a care-taker of as collateral to go and take a loan o! Be advised o, yoo!

Some things are better kept a secret. Don’t be transparent about everything. How can you tell your wife you have been paying fees for a young lady at the university? Or better still tell her because the two shall become one, slay Q Angela gets you upset and for that matter, you rush to your wife to confess to her. Go ahead! Hmmmm!

This is probably one of the reasons I have a problem with people who call themselves ‘Solomon’ yet have only one wife. Waste of name for nothing!

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Ehern come to think of it, when the white-man says it is a crime to have more than one Christian wife, can we Africans also go and rent an office in oyibo-land for Polygamists Association Secretariat? All we need to say is that we want to be an NGO! In fact, I think the membership will be so huge that we may need several hectares of land to build an office for polygamists. Polygamy and that disgusting thing, which one must be discouraged? Ah!

I still cannot believe that this disgusting thing really exists. Ah! The way God has planned it for man and woman to enjoy each other paa and I hear discussions about this ‘iron-enter-iron’ thing, I feel nauseous. Ah!

Eiiii. I just remembered the dream I had about someone last weekend o. Dreams can be funny er. You are driving and before you know it, you are being driven. And then the next thing you see in the dream, you are climbing a mango tree to pluck coconut! Sometimes, you see bundles of 200 ghana notes being given to you and then you wake up and your wallet is ‘spacious’!

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In the dream I had last week er, hmmm; I pray I never have such a dream again. I was in the bathroom with this single lady who has ‘denied me access’ for many years so I gave up. I don’t know where this dream came from. I saw her in my dream. In the dream, she was bathing and I was in the bathroom too. She was standing in front of me, still bathing. I drooled!

Honestly I don’t know what brought me to the bathroom in which she was. I was controlling myself in the dream until the soap she was bathing with fell on the floor and she bent down to pick it while in front of me! OMG!

At that point I told myself what can come; even some preacher men could fall. Then I heard a knock on my main gate that woke me up. Ah! Ah! Ah! It was the guy who has been collecting my refuse (borla) who was coming for his money for the month! I almost cursed him and abrogated the contract between me and him for denying me access to the ‘promised land’

Kweku, abeg, if this is the first time you are reading from me, then you have a problem o. There is nothing useful here o. Hahahahaha. All I talk about is basaaaa….chakaaaaaa. Non-fa nkoaaa!

Total abstract with nothing to learn from but it releases stress but one thing is for sure: ‘Don’t Read’ because there is no order. One moment, a story starts and the next moment another story enters and disrupts it. Don’t mind the author. They are all lies ooo….hahahahahaha!

Do you know the worst scammer in the world? He is that vegetarian who tells you he doesn’t eat cow meat but prefers to eat wele. If you don’t fear such a person, follow him and you are doomed o, yoo. Some of them claim they don’t drink alcohol; go and smell the malt bottle they sent their children with and you would understand why the palm tree is arguably the most useful plant nature has given us; everything can be gotten from it including palm wine from which akpeteshie is distilled!

They are the same people who would tell you not to eat cow meat because the fat of the cow will accumulate in your stomach. Where do the cows get the fat from? From the grass they chew? We like deceiving ourselves o, debida!

I was at a joint around the December inside last year and saw this nice place and decided to make myself happy with fufu and abenkwan (palm nut soup) as displayed on their signpost. You won’t believe this. Lord God have mercy. Some people don’t know how to cook o, yet they have adopted catering as their business. What I saw was plain water that looked like apple fruit juice.

The soup was so transparent I could see the fish and meat at the bottom. So badly prepared as if it was purgative and sadly the waitress was so proud of having served me the best lunch of her life. She first wasted my time. You know how annoying it can be when you enter an eating place and the first thing they bring to you is water to wash your hands with.

The next thing is to bring tissue. Then they delay you for 20-30 minutes before the food arrives. Auntie, is it food I want to eat or water to wash my hands with? Know your customers’ priorities o. this was what the lady did to me.

I was so disappointed and asked her to go back to catering school. As far as I am concerned, the abenkwan must be thick and opaque such that sometimes one requires fork and knife to cut it. The lady, feeling embarrassed at my outburst defended herself by saying that the customers who come to eat there prefer the abenkwan to be light. I told her it was a lie unless of course eno bi Ghana we dey!

I looked around and realized there was only one other person in the chop bar. The others went to a nearby joint where they sold the same fufu and abenkwan but what misled me to this transparent abenkwan base was the signpost. It was so beautifully designed with nice pictures of thick abenkwan but the opposite was the case. The other joint being patronized by more people had no signpost!

That is why it is dangerous to be judgmental. What you see in others, chances are that, they exist in you. You see, when you see a man and a 26-year old single lady entering a guest house at odd hours, what comes to your mind? Whatever comes to mind is bcos you have been there before and as to whether you went there to fast and pray, God dey watch we all o, yooo. Every human being is both good and bad including you and I, or?

Greetings to my Assistant, Samuel Arthur Oduro (Macho-man), who is so full of ideas and energy that he went to the gym and broke his leg. Hahahahahaha! Macho, remember COVID is real o, yoo.

Tags: HumorTransparent
Jerry Tsatro Mordy

Jerry Tsatro Mordy

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